


get used to different

by yodalorian



Category: Christian Bible (New Testament), The Chosen (TV)
Genre: Asperger Syndrome, Bible, Christianity, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-12
Updated: 2020-06-12
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:48:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 465
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24689410
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yodalorian/pseuds/yodalorian
Summary: Matthew, the least likely to be called by Jesus, is called nevertheless.
Relationships: Matthew (The Chosen) & Jesus (The Chosen)
Comments: 5
Kudos: 20





	get used to different

**Author's Note:**

> matthew's parents hate him so i'm adopting him
> 
> i don't personally have asperger's so apologies if i get it wrong

“Matthew, son of Alpheus.”

For a half-second, Matthew thought there was another Matthew, son of Alpheus, hiding behind him. But there wasn’t. Jesus’s warm brown eyes were staring right at him, almost through him, the way they had stared at Simon on the lake or the paralytic who had been lowered through the roof. 

No. It was impossible. If those eyes saw Matthew, really saw him, they’d fill with disgust and revulsion. Jesus would spit on his shoes and chase him away, like everyone else. But Jesus only smiled his enigmatic smile and waited. Impossible things had been happening lately.

A sudden wave of apprehension surged in him. No, something more fluttery than that. Hope. His hands began their nervous trembling, the thousand voices in his head erupting once again.

“Follow me.”

For once, the voices quieted, and Matthew had never felt more sure of anything in his life.

He hurried out of his booth and collided into Gaius. The Roman’s face was scowling in confusion. Matthew knew the question before it left Gaius’s lips. What was Matthew thinking? He was comfortable and he was rich. But wealth was the last thing on Matthew’s mind. Could he be part of the ragtag band of fishermen and craftsmen that followed Jesus? They were on a mission to touch hearts and heal spirits. Matthew...Matthew was a social trainwreck. Conversations with him ended with strange looks and excuses to leave, at best. There was always something he didn’t get, something he was too dumb to understand. Best he stuck to the numbers, where everything made sense and meant exactly what it was supposed to.

His heart sank further as he saw Simon sidle up next to Jesus. Matthew recognized what was happening all too well. Didn’t Jesus know who Matthew was? A  _ tax collector _ , a traitor to his own people, complicit in oppression, shunned even by his parents. Unworthy to be mud on a sandal. He was different. He was unredeemable. He waited for Jesus to nod and turn away.

Jesus’s eyes stayed on him. “Get used to different.”

Four words rekindled the dying spark of hope. No. No. This was the only thing that Matthew had ever wanted, truly wanted, for himself. Newfound courage turned into anger, and he pushed past Gaius, leaving the Roman staring at him in shock. Dammit if Matthew was going to let anything keep him from this.

“I’m glad we passed by your booth today, Matthew.” Jesus’s smile was open and welcoming, as if they were already old friends. Matthew didn’t really know how friends were supposed to be, but if it was like this he liked it already.

Later, Matthew realized he was still clutching his tablet. He decided to pocket it, in case he wanted to write anything down.

**Author's Note:**

> follow me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/jedioncer?lang=en)  
> to hear me yell about other dumb things


End file.
